Yesterday, Misty and I were discussing the validity of asking advice from those that seem so much worse off than you. As I have said before, my life is serving as a warning to others, but sometimes I do make good rally speeches. I sent this to someone a few days ago, and actually amended its tone for someone else today, so I decided to share. Mostly because I was over being Debbie Downer. Make it applicable to you.
So what if your MFA is indulgent? It strikes me that you are not indulgent enough. Spoil yourself. Allow yourself to do something that causes you to leap out of bed on Monday, frantic and excited. Invest in your soul and
your intellect (which in turn will invest in your other relationships). If you had told me a year ago that I would be in school full time and not working, I would have told you there was no way to make it happen. But being with orange really helped me see that it's ok to leap. And while you may think I am taking a practical direction, it doesn't feel that way. And I’m ok with that. I think doing something you want to do, whatever it is, will help position you for something better. You know how when you are really happy in a relationship, other people start hitting on you? It’s b/c you are putting out this amazing energy. I feel the same things will happen if you enter a scholastic environment you really love. You’ll attract
other opportunities. Will you finish and be a full time novelist? Maybe not, but you will position yourself for the next thing. And you'll have awakened a spirit that is suffocating thoroughly.
This is it. It sounds cliché, but we only get to do this once. Everything is fixable except death. We can DO anything if we allow ourselves. As someone commented on my recent post, "btw its pretty damn easy to forget that this experience is yours, you are the only one having it, and the only thing you can control is you and your experience."
Now, if I could just listen to my external voice, instead of the one that fucks me up all the time.